A Look Back, To The Future
Lenny Donnarumma, he/him, Guest Writer
@product19 on all social media
Stonewall Sports Boston, Member
It’s hard to believe that 2023 will mark the fifth year since I stepped into Stonewall Sports Boston, and my sixth year participating in a multi-dimensional queer recreational sports league. The evolution of the Stonewall Boston Chapter is somewhat ambiguous to some. In 2017 there were a total of three similar leagues that were descending on Boston. I can guess that some of us in the league look at our uniform/tee we proudly wear each week and wonder, what was going on back in 2017?
The Boston chapter of Stonewall Sports started with billiards. When I joined back in 2018 it included dodgeball and billiards, only to see Stonewall Boston fade into the sunset. It wasn’t for lack of interest, but more of the awakening of so-called recreational queer multi-sports leagues in this area. What is it? Do I want to be a part of this? The social app evolution continued to grow, while the erosion of gay bars and clubs in the region continued. Some of us were indecisive or unsure of what are we left with socially that would provide the most interest and engagement? The leaders of two of the leagues that established their presence in 2017/18 moved on and there wasn’t much support to keep them moving forward. Fast-forward to 2020 and the chatter that Stonewall Sports Boston would be rising from the ashes and would be back. And did it ever!
Spring 2021 marked the return of Stonewall Sports Boston, and established itself as one of the multitude of local queer sports options in Boston. Boston is small, but has a big sports presence, for the few of us that might notice. Not just professional or college sports, but many gay sports leagues in Boston that have existed for, dare I say, decades?
Stonewall Sports, nationally, has almost forty-thousand members in more than 23 cities across the country and recently added their thirteenth sport, pickleball, in which Stonewall Boston was the first to introduce to the local queer community. Did you know Stonewall Sports, not only here in Boston, but across the country is run by volunteers and is a true non-profit in every sense of it’s being? Yes! Volunteering, providing low-cost organized sports to us, the queer, allies, advocates, the she/her, they/thems and all of us, whatever your race, pronouns, or income, is a big part of the foundation of this league and giving back to our community. It’s something to be proud to be part of. Not all leagues support this, let alone can say this.
If you’re reading this and haven’t come to explore the league or feel you’re not good enough, or good at any sport, or not good at making friends, you will be pleasantly surprised, supported and welcomed. Join us. If you’re already here, as a leader, a team player or someone that can make a difference in someone’s life or can offer insight, consider making a mental note that some newbies could use a resource and might be too intimidated to ask. Provide guidance, teach the game, help them to learn the rules, or build someone's confidence. Be that person out there that someone didn’t know they needed.
I get the feeling at times that some might misinterpret me, my intentions, and take me as a know-it-all. Pardon me if that thought has entered your mind, as it is not my intention. I only want people to feel welcome, have a better experience at whatever it is I might be sharing, and hope someone will learn from my experiences. I want to provide guidance, be a resource, if needed, and hope anyone that joins and gets out of it what they had hoped. In the end we are all here to have fun. For some of us it’s a needed new social activity, or an escape for what’s going on in their world, or to make new friends - and you will. Stonewall Sports Boston is here for you.
The league is here to provide fun, celebrate our similarities, sometimes our differences and lift us up. We are here because of the ties that bond us, never lose sight of that. We are the tag line you see on StonewallBoston.org: ``More than a league, we are a community!” A family, the new friends that you will meet and you know will be in your life forever. May our bonds grow stronger and we continue to respect each other and escape at times, part of the world that might continue to marginalize us and our community. We still have our battles in the world and there’s not always a clear path.
To the veterans throughout our sports, join me in being that resource, a guide that can support our captains, co-captains and all of the volunteers that are part of Boston’s success. Step in and help if you see the opportunity to those new to the league that join us for whatever reason. It’s not always easy being new, we’ve all been there. Lend an ear, a helping hand, compassion and guidance. Little gestures can go a long way - and who knows, could be the one positive thing someone experiences that day. Be positive, always respectful and remember, you don’t know what is going on in someone’s life. To be positive is self-fulfilling. To be negative is the easy way out.
I am thrilled to see the growth of Stonewall Sports Boston, and the good this league has brought to our community. I am ever thankful for those in the past that helped resurrect the league and to the people today, the volunteers that make it happen week after week, season after season and to the future of Stonewall Boston. Thank the leaders, coordinators, the friend that brought you here and if you can, get involved. The league can always use help, even if it’s just for a day in setting up or helping out.
If you haven’t experienced any of this, please pay a visit, watch, learn and join for a season, or two. If you’re already here, or new and need help, it’s OK to ask for it. If you want to get involved, reach out to one of the league coordinators, organizers and know they will welcome you with open arms. Thanks to the league leaders, and all of us as a community coming together to support each other. “Individually, we are one drop. Together, we are an ocean.”
Springtime in a few short weeks. See you on the court, in the cornhole, taking a ball to the face, at the park, on the fields and maybe hearing me yell, as an umpire: “FOUL! You stepped over the line - those runs don’t count. Get back here, Eddie!”
Cheers to a successful spring, summer and fall for all in Stonewall Sports Boston.
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❖ Fun is a big part of the organized league at Stonewall Sports Boston. The league supports our community with philanthropic efforts continuously. Get involved.
❖ Needing help is never something to be ashamed of. Stonewall Sports Boston provides fee waivers for those in need. Please email Stonewall Sports Boston for more information via StonewallBoston.org
❖ The community locally, citywide and statewide offer resources to all of us in any and many situations. Always know you are not alone. We see you. It’s okay, not to be okay.
If you need help, resources are available. Take that step and get the help you need for your well-being or provide these resources to those in need:
○ The Commonwealth of Massachusetts: LGBTQ Resource Guide for Adult/Young Adults
○ Among the Commonwealth’s list is The Trevor Project: trevorproject.org
❖ This spotlight is for someone I lost, who is dear to my heart. He knew this organization would be impactful for the future of LGBTQ+ youth the year of its inception in 2010, when those three words were uttered: It gets better. Those words started a movement that has grown globally.
○ He convinced his mom to spotlight ItGetsBetter.org on their holiday card. I photographed him with his siblings, my nephews and niece, in purple. Today ItGetsBetter.org is now globally present in 19 countries, providing access to resources for LGBTQ+ youth. You would be proud of their evolution, Vance 💜
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